hey i'm back again. i had the best day ever yesterday. i got to get up and go back to st. jude's instead of that other stupid gross church and this time mom came with me! she met with rev'd iscariot and they seemed to get along okay, i guess. i don't think she told him anything about me, like about me being crazy or anything, heh, so i guess he's in for a surprise. it was good to have such a nice day 'cause i think i was cycling again, feeling pretty low or whatever. i felt quiet but kind of mellow, guess my new meds are giving me a nice buzz.
so at coffee hour as mom and rev'd iscariot were talking i asked if i could go up the youth room and they said sure so i went up and some people were hanging out so i joined them. i realized as i got up there that i hadn't really introduced myself to them properly yet; i had been pretty quiet the last couple of times i'd been there. not everybody was there that day - i think just alex, sonora, anna, phil, laura, and rice. we were all hanging out and phil took a bunch of photos. then rice started doing this project rev'd iscariot asked her to do, he asked her to film some little videos of us talking about god. i was feeling kind of weird at that point; the youth room is really cool, all these words and things have been painted on the walls and i was reading them. i don't really remember all of what they said but they seemed almost to be, like, pulsing on the wall, like,
read me, read me and inwardly digest my meaning. god, it sounds so crazy, you guys must think i'm a TOTAL freak.
anyway, while i was wandering around i heard the others sort of talking about me; phil was like, "what's she doing?" and laura goes, "i don't think she's really checked out the youth room before," and then she came right over and was like, "hey, you want to hang out?" she's got these big brown eyes that sparkle when she smiles - i felt like a little kid getting her first valentine. so i was like, "okay," and i went to sit with them.
so rice filmed a bunch and then turned the camera over to alex, who was being his usual slightly-adorable-slightly-obnoxious self, heh. he turned it on me and asked me what i thought about god. phil was like, "yeah, you're always talking about god." i was still feeling kind of loopy but it was...i don't know, a different kind of loopy? hahahaha so nuts, i don't know what that means. it just felt different, i felt
clearer somehow. even my dry mouth went away. i started trying to explain about how i thought god was everywhere, and even in the bad places. and it was so amazing, you guys, i felt like the whole world had gone still and every angel in all of existence had stopped time and were all looking at this one room with all of us in it. it felt just like...well, i'll takl about that part later, maybe. :) i guess it's worth sharing since i felt like i actually made some friends yesterday. anyway i got invited to this sleepover they're having at the end of may and i guess i'll go. it sounds like fun. i'll catch you guys later, you really made my week. :) -'shua
so at coffee hour as mom and rev'd iscariot were talking i asked if i could go up the youth room and they said sure so i went up and some people were hanging out so i joined them. i realized as i got up there that i hadn't really introduced myself to them properly yet; i had been pretty quiet the last couple of times i'd been there. not everybody was there that day - i think just alex, sonora, anna, phil, laura, and rice. we were all hanging out and phil took a bunch of photos. then rice started doing this project rev'd iscariot asked her to do, he asked her to film some little videos of us talking about god. i was feeling kind of weird at that point; the youth room is really cool, all these words and things have been painted on the walls and i was reading them. i don't really remember all of what they said but they seemed almost to be, like, pulsing on the wall, like, read me, read me and inwardly digest my meaning. god, it sounds so crazy, you guys must think i'm a TOTAL freak.
so rice filmed a bunch and then turned the camera over to alex, who was being his usual slightly-adorable-slightly-obnoxious self, heh. he turned it on me and asked me what i thought about god. phil was like, "yeah, you're always talking about god." i was still feeling kind of loopy but it was...i don't know, a different kind of loopy? hahahaha so nuts, i don't know what that means. it just felt different, i felt clearer somehow. even my dry mouth went away. i started trying to explain about how i thought god was everywhere, and even in the bad places. and it was so amazing, you guys, i felt like the whole world had gone still and every angel in all of existence had stopped time and were all looking at this one room with all of us in it. it felt just like...well, i'll takl about that part later, maybe. :) i guess it's worth sharing since i felt like i actually made some friends yesterday. anyway i got invited to this sleepover they're having at the end of may and i guess i'll go. it sounds like fun. i'll catch you guys later, you really made my week. :) -'shua
No comments:
Post a Comment